Sunday, October 5, 2014

Yarn Like Crack

I have a confession.  I bought more yarn.

Yes, I know I said that I was going to use up my stash and I swear that's what I'm doing (too).

But I went on Twitter last Sunday, and yarn was there and it was on sale and the last thing I remember is saying something like "cotton alpaca blend" and getting out my credit card. 

And then I suddenly had enough yarn for two more sweaters and another pair of socks.

I know, I know.  The yarn-buying blackouts aren't a good sign.  But you have to imagine for a minute what it would be like if a drug overlord went on Twitter and tweeted "30% off all black tar heroin.  Enter code GET2HIGH at checkout."

I don't know what it is about knitters and yarn, but I do know that I'm not alone, because someone can go on Twitter and Facebook and post pictures of unopened yarn and a whole bunch of us will be like, "oh my goddddd... LOOK at that."  You can hear the dopamine rush streaming through our voices.  

It's even jokingly referred to as "yarn porn" and "eye candy."  Except that we're not joking.

Another confession: a friend once sent me a photo of a guy sprawled out on a bed and said, "I'm going to get a 'throw' like this for MY bed."

I stared at that photo for a good 15 minutes.  I thought, "I don't get it... it's just a plan white afghan... I can't really see the stitch detail, of course, because that guy is lying on it, but it doesn't look like much... Maybe the yarn is cashmere or something?"  

I actually tried to zoom in around the guy to see the blanket a bit better, but to no avail.  I became a bit annoyed that someone would tease me with a photo of an afghan like that.

Two days later, it dawned on me.  It was a joke.  The GUY was the "throw."  Ohhhhhh...   Luckily I didn't send her my reaction, so she never knew.  (Until now, of course.)

In my defense, the guy was one of the Chippendale-type-looking guys, and I really don't find them attractive.  (I like people who look, you know, normal.)  That said, I can't hide the fact that, given the choice between a semi-naked male model and yarn, I checked out the... yarn.

This weekend has been a banner knitting weekend for a very odd reason.  In keeping with my decision to use up my stash (which is now a bit larger, what with the recent purchase), I told myself that I couldn't start any new projects until I finished a couple of projects that had been waiting in the wings here for... well, let's say "months" and leave it at that.

In one case, all I had left to do was the sleeves.  But I got aggravated because shortly after I started one of the sleeves, I made a mistake, way back when, so I had to rip it out.  As I did, I think the bad-mojo came over me, because I suddenly decided that this particular sweater wouldn't even look good on me, and I... gave up.

The thing is, once you've knit the front and the back, joined the shoulders and put on a neckline, you can't really "give up" on a sweater.  You need to finish it, come what may.  Well, I couldn't face the thought of finishing a sweater only to conclude that it "sucks" in some way, so I tossed it in the closet.

This week, I took the sweater out and told myself, "This is silly.  Finish the thing.  Before you start anything new.  It must be done."  So I did it.

And irony of ironies... I LOVE THIS SWEATER.  I can't believe that poor thing sat in a closet and just WAITED for me for, well, let's say "months."  I can kind of see why I thought I wouldn't like it, because the style is very different from what I usually make, but that has now become the reason why I love it.

In the end, I think my initial fear that it would "suck" stemmed from the fact that, around the same time, I made another sweater, one that I thought would be "cool," and that one, in fact, sucked.  (I know I'm using that word a lot, but when a sweater goes south on you, that's really the only polite word that comes to mind.)

With yarn, as with life, context is everything, and recent experience shapes perception.  When that experience is good, well, then, yarn is like crack. 

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Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote, "Life is short, but there is always time for courtesy."